A different way to see

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. Psalm 139:14-16

I used to have a routine that I did every morning upon waking up:

My alarm would go off and before I could even fully open my eyes I would open up Facebook and start to scroll. Checking on what I missed while I slept. At the time I was following lots of people in the fitness industry and though many of their post were positive and inspiring I would always come across on or two that gave me that nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach. Then I would jump over to instagram and do the same. Scroll to just catch up I would tell myself. Inevitably I would come across something that would jump out at me. A body type I wanted, an accomplishment I coveted. All of this before I was even awake!!! The first images I saw and thought I had were how I in some way did not measure up. I was reminded that I did not have something that someone else did.

 

We are all guilty of this, comparing ourselves to others. Someone who has better abs, better legs, is stronger than us, cooks better, has better hair. It is endless and can make you crazy!! It makes me crazy!!!

 

So I decided I was going to do something different.   I was going to work on building that elusive “confidence” that you read about in self help books. So I did everything that everyone says to do. I created mantras I would say when I felt less than, I would set goals for myself, I would push myself harder and wonder why I was never happy and always felt anxious. Nothing worked. As I began to get closer to God and spent more time in his word I began to realize the reasons why these tips and tricks did nothing to ease my pain and anxiety. They were all based in ME. I just had to believe in ME, have confidence in ME, trust ME, be a better ME. But what God was telling me in his word was that it was Him who I needed to trust.

 

In Psalm 139:14-16 God tells us how he feels about us. He tells us we are “fearfully and wonderfully made” that we are “woven together in the depths of the earth” that He “saw my unformed body” and that “all the days ordained for me were written in his book before one if them came to be” WOW. I realized that God himself formed me. He decided how I was going to look, the size of my butt and legs and brain and heart. He created me with my purpose in mind because he saw my life in total before I was even created. I don’t know about you but I feel pretty confident that God knows what he is doing. I mean he created the EARTH. I realized that my questioning if I was pretty enough, skinny enough or strong enough was doubting God. I was basically saying he was wrong and in creating me the perfect and all knowing God made a mistake. Opinion of myself was right. I was trying to “fix” myself to mold to everyone else’s view of perfection. Or the unattainable picture of perfection I had created in my mind. Not realizing or accepting that I was already made perfect.

 

This scripture put it all in perspective for me. Who was I to think I knew better. I stood strong in the knowledge that even if my thighs were thick it was all part of His plan. If my hair was dark and curly and not long and blond it must be that way for a reason I don’t know about yet. I began to relish my body, love it for its perfection. Yes I said it my body is perfect!!! Not by the worlds standards but by GOD’S STANDARDS. He created me for exactly what He wants me to achieve in this world and this life. There is no need for me to look outside or to compare. It’s like being a doctor and being upset because I was not a good lawyer. We are all perfect in the same way, for our purpose. What comfort there is in that!!!

 

The shield that I use to protect myself from images of this world that make me start to compare and feel less than is my bible and Gods truth. His word is the best self help book out there. I also take periodic breaks from social media. Checking it twice a day only or just deleting the app for a full 7 days. It’s a nice reminder that the world still turns even though I don’t read about it on facebook.

 

As for me my morning routine has changed dramatically. I try not to get on social media until I spend even 5 mins in the Word. Then I make sure to schedule time each day to pray and reflect. In that time I try to get in some time with God saying good morning and thanking Him for his blessings. I tend to the things that matter most, that make me strong before I allow the world in.

 

I have also begun to use a great app called First 5. It is a small devotional that you can set as your alarm. So when your alarm goes off the first thing you see is an inspiring word and some scripture. It has helped immensely to stop the facebook surfing first thing in the am.

 

Some verses I stand on:

 

Psalm 139:14

1Tim 1:7

Isa 49:16

Psalm 138:8

Romans 12:2