coach

All or Nothing

I have said this before I’m an all or nothing woman.  This is in all parts of my life.  I work hard, rest hard, love hard.  It’s the way I have been since I can remember.  I believed it has served me well for the past 45 years.  I have been successful, I have a great husband, I have a great daughter, I have my own business.  Notice the I’s: for my entire life I have run the show.  It has been me and my hard work that has gotten me where I am.

I did a Crossfit competition a couple of week ago and it was hard, really hard.  5 workouts (when there are usually 3) tough competition and my partner and I pushed.  We did well 2nd place, I was really happy with that.  But it took me 7 days to recover from this competition.  I felt like I had been hit by a bus.  My nervous system was shot, my workouts were crap and I was useless to my family. Through it all the word that kept repeating over and over in my head was WHY.  Why do I push this hard, why am I working out for as long as I do each day?  Why do I want to be this supreme Crossfitter?  Why do I care so much?

I came up with a couple of things:

  • I honestly do not know what I would do with myself if I didn’t have the goal of training hard to be a competitive Crossfitter. Who would I be?  I am good at Crossfit people know me for that.  And if I was really honest with myself I know exactly what I need to be doing instead of working out 2 hours a day and I am using Crossfit as a controllable distraction.  Something I can be sure of the outcome of because what God wants me to do is not as clear and straight forward as a 12 min workout.  The purpose he has for me cannot be improved upon in a 12 week training cycle and I won’t be able to know if I did well until I am with Him and He calls me his faithful servant.  No immediate gratification, no podiums.
  • I am afraid that my body will go to crap.  And I am pissed that I care so much.  Again there is no need for me to be 12% body fat.  It’s great but my body fat being that low and me being this muscular is really not necessary.  I can be fit.  I can be healthy.  My appearance is what I am know for, without it who would I be?  What would people think?  Again the all or nothing attitude.  I can’t just be fit I have to be the fittest.  I have forgotten who I am.  Who I am has absolutely nothing to do with my weight or body fat.  Who I am is who God says I am.  No where in the bible does it say I need to be super lean muscular to lead people to Him.  I know what you are may be thinking: it is good to be the best that you can be and I agree but it is NOT good to worship that ideal.  To make it an idol, to define myself by it.

These truths were hard to realize and harder to admit.  Now that I know all of this what do I do with it?  That is still a work in progress.  I am praying A LOT.  Asking for guidance and courage to let go of this need to control and distract myself.  Asking for faith and trust to wait on God’s plan and not to rush ahead on my own.  I am terrified of what the future holds.  Not because I believe it will be bad but because sometimes I don’t feel worthy enough for how good its going to be.

My biggest fear is that I will be average.  What I have forgotten is that I can never be average!!! That fear is a lie.

But instead of starting from a place of average, I must remember what God says I am and that is far from average and that is without doing a thing!

 

Update:

So it is 3 weeks after the competition and I am feeling a lot better physically.  This is giving me a lot of clarity mentally.  I am so grateful for this experience.  It has been a perspective and reality check for me.  It has woken me up to what matters most, what Gods plan is for me and challenged my faith.

What am I doing now? I am working out 5 days a week.  If I am tired I ease off.  If I feel good I push.  As for my nutrition I have not been tracking much at all for the last three weeks.  I am back to tracking with some adjustments and it feels good.  If I start to feel anxious about it I will stop. If I start to think about it too much I will stop.  The key for me is to constantly keep connected and honest about how I feel.  To trust that feeling I get inside when something needs to change.  Allow it to guide my decisions and not get in its way.

Consistency Not Perfection

I am an all or nothing kinda girl.  I can’t just do the sprint Spartan I have to do the Super.  I can’t just do a Crossfit competition to me it might as well be the Crossfit Games.  I can’t eat one chip it has to be the whole bag, with salsa, and cheese.

So when I asked on social media what most people struggle with when it comes to living a healthy lifestyle the biggest thing people talked about was staying on track.  Not letting weekends, weddings, parties and life cause them to be distracted and fall back into bad habits.

So I want to share with you the things that I do to focus on my goals while still enjoying life. I am not perfect.  I struggle too.  Many people call this balance but I don’t believe there is such a thing as balance.  Balance implies perfection and unless you are God perfection is impossible.  That’s where my helpful tips start:

1-      The definition of consistency is “logically ordered and/or following a pattern.  Agreement or logical coherence among things or parts.  Firmness of constitution or character.  What this all means is that the Majority of the time things stay the same.  No big changes.  No big highs or lows.  In the context of food and eating this means eating the same way the majority of the time.  No binges, to elimination.  I apply this to my life by going to weddings, ballgames, parties and vacations but I remain logical and don’t drink all the wine, I have a glass.  I don’t eat all the deserts I pick the one I want.  I don’t eat all the bread in the bread basket I have one slice.  Notice I didn’t deny myself the bread, wine or desert, I had them in MODERATION, enjoyed them without GUILT and moved on.  We run into trouble when we say we CAN’T have something, suddenly we desperately WANT IT.  Then because we think we can’t have it we eat much more than we should because we feel like it is the one opportunity to eat it so might as well go big or go home.  Feast or famine, all or nothing.  Not the logical patterned order that is consistency.

2-      Food does not have a soul.  That being said without a soul you cannot attach any moral labels to it.  Food is not GOOD or BAD.  It is food.  When we apply these labels some foods become bad and others good which causes us to morally judge our choices.  And when we don’t make the right choices WE become bad or good not the choice.  The filter I pass my food choices through is this:  How will this food make me feel? Is it worth it?  Will having that third drink or eating that 2nd slice of pizza or piece of cake bring me closer to my goals?  Will a bite of cake or one glass of wine serve the same purpose?  A thoughtful choice prevents and emotional reaction.  Emotional eating brings guilt and shame two things that should not be attached to food

3-      On the subject of emotional eating…. I totally get needing something sweet before bed (a square of dark chocolate usually does the trick) Or when it is that time of the month and you just need a bowl of ice cream.  It is ok.  The trouble occurs when we feel bad about it.  Feeling guilty doesn’t change the fact that you ate it.  Own it.  Have some introspection and figure out what you were feeling that caused it.  Don’t hide it or pretend it didn’t happen.  Talk about it with a trusted friend.  Shine a light on it.  The more we own our choice and don’t write them off as bad the less we will have to start over.

So there is no magic solution.  It’s not easy.  Staying consistent is hard, it takes work.  Integrity is doing what you say you are going to do.  Have integrity to yourself and your goals.  Own your emotions.  Own your choices.  Do not sacrifice long term success for short term gratification.  With food or with life.

5 Ways to Make Breakfast happen

You hear it all the time, “breakfast is the most important meal of the day”.  It is called a break fast because you have not eaten for over 7 hours!!! Breakfast kick starts your bodies metabolism for the day, it is the signal to your digestive system to wake up!  If you work out in the am it is even more important to get something in.  My experience as a coach, trainer and busy mom is that breakfast is one of the hardest meals to get people to eat!  Not enough time, no appetite and not knowing what to eat.  Here are 5 tips that will help you make breakfast happen EVERYDAY:

1-      Plan and prepare:  This is probably one of the most important tips.  If your house is anything like mine mornings are hectic.  Walking dogs, feeding kids, showering leave little time or brain power to make good food choices.  The night before I make my breakfast and put it in the fridge.  I lay out my clothes and my daughters clothes for the day.  I make lunches.  So that when I start my day it feels organized not rushed and I can just reach into the fridge for something to eat. Some good options are hard boiled eggs, overnight oats (recipe at the end) or a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. All can be made ahead and are portable.

2-      Drink your breakfast: Many people cannot eat solid food early in the morning.  Making yourself a protein shake or smoothie in the am is a great option especially if you work out early in the am.  Shakes digest quicker and you can drink them on the way to the gym.  You can also make them as simple (Advocare Meal Replacement shake is my go to) or as complex as you want adding fruit, oats, greens milk or yogurt.

3-      Fruit:  Fruit is natures to go food.  It is perfect for the am.  What is easier than grabbing a banana or apple as you walk out the door? Pop some berries in your mouth.  All easy stuff

4-      Cut the caffeine:  Many people say they are not hungry in the am.  But they drink 4 cups of coffee before 10am.  Caffeine mutes your appetite, and if you need anything more than a cup before 10am that lack of energy may be your body’s need for food and not more caffeine.  The body can adapt to anything until it doesn’t anymore then you will need more caffeine and be less hungry and that can leads to all sorts of other problems.  Start small with a shake(adding protein powder to iced coffee is delicious!) then move to a piece of fruit.  No one is asking you to have a stack of pancakes, eggs and bacon when you can stomach a piece of toast.  Ease in and I promise your will start waking up and wanting to eat.

5-      Decide to make the change:  All of these tips are great but its up to you to decide to make the change.  Tell yourself you will eat breakfast everyday for 7 days.  Post it to social media to keep you accountable.  Then turn the 7 days to 2 week, then a month and the next thing you know you will not understand how you functioned without your favorite meals of the day BREAKFAST

Overnight oats:

2 cups old fashioned oats

4 tablespoons Chia seeds

2 cups almond milk

Cinnamon

Vanilla extract

I add a little sugar free syrup but that is optional

Mix together in a Tupperware or big Mason jar and keep in the fridge overnight.  In the am add whatever fruit and nut butter you like and enjoy!!!